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You always said if your man cheated, you'd leave him so fast his head would spin. But now that it's happened it's not so black and white, is it? Caroline Madden, MFT is an affair recovery specialist. She works with couples dealing with serious problems in their relationships. In "Fool Me Once ," she shares the criteria she uses to determine if a man is truly remorseful and determined to save his marriage. Here is some of the information she shares: 5 Things That Look Suspicious (But Probably Aren't) 5 Signs You Should Consider Giving Him Another Chance 7 Signs He is Going to Cheat Again (And You Will Be Hurt Again) Infidelity is traumatic, and you need to take time to assess the situation. "Fool Me Once " will give you the tools you need to evaluate your relationship. It will help you determine whether you should trust your husband or not and decide if your marriage is worth saving. Don't Make a Decision Now That You'll Regret Later! As they say "Fool me once, shame on "you." Fool me twice, shame on "me."" From the Author: An affair doesn't mean your marriage is over and you need to seek advice on how to divorce your husband. How do I know this? I am an Affair Recovery Specialist, serving as a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in California. I work almost exclusively with adults with significant relationship problems. Dealing with the aftermath of affairs is my specialty. I'll tell you what strong women do. They sit back and let the dust settle. Right now, you are one of those snow globes you pick up as a souvenir when you travel. You are all shaken up, and you need to let some of those snowflakes settle to gain clarity as to what the picture is. You may not realize it, but you are in a state of trauma right now, so you shouldn't be making any big decisions just yet. That includes putting your house up for sale, putting all his stuff in the street, calling the affair partner's husband, and/or telling everyone in the world that he cheated on you. When you regain your composure, these are all things you will regret. Trust me. As a therapist, I help women like you determine if the man who has betrayed them should be trusted or not. In some cases, I help them decide if the relationship itself is worth saving, even if the unfaithful man seems sincerely repentant. If you are like most women I see in your situation, you are thinking that there is no way your relationship can survive this explosion. Believe it or not, statistics prove that many couples survive affairs. You probably feel like you will never be capable of trusting him again, and forgiveness may seem impossible right now. However, relationships do evolve and grow stronger if both parties are truly committed to working things out. I see it happen all the time. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on "me."
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